Feeder bands or peripheral winds

Feeder bands or peripheral winds ?

Nowhere on earth can you go without experiencing storms in some fashion or the other. Thunderstorms, NorEasters, Hurricanes, Tropical storms or depressions, are all names of types of storms but essentially they are created the same, and they create the same effect in the end, destruction in its wake. If you are fortunate enough to have missed the storm but still close enough, you might be feeling the effects of the storm with strong gusty winds. What you do not know is whether these winds are feeding the storms ( feeder bands) or are these winds simply the after shocks of the storm as peripheral winds.

So too is the nature of anger. When someone falls into this state, this generates so much of negativity that you cannot help but get dragged into it. This is like the periphery winds, where you feel the energy of these negative winds emanating from the storm of anger, and this energy can sway you toward the storm. This eventually can also lead to feeder bands or winds. These winds as the name suggests feed the storm with moisture and power, enabling the storm to grow. So too if we let ourselves dragged into the storm with our own negativity and react, we just enable someone else's anger ( verbal or vocal) to grow. We can talk or think negatively very easily about another who we once respected or spoke fondly about, in the presence of another who is spurring a negative portrayal  of  this person. They are generating anger, hatred and a lack of positivity, but it does not mean that we have to feed the storm or for that matter be effected by the peripheral windy backlash. 

Holding your ground in a storm is not easy, but with the correct foundation and the correct frame of mind, it is not only possible but necessary so as to not lose footing when dealing with tumultuous emotions. Non reaction is part of the process, but so is a positive reaction if needed. How can this be?  How can you be equanimous yet be reactive? This is the art of meditation and enlightenment. When faced with a negative situation, reacting positively will enable the balance to be restored and equanimity to reign. So using the hypothetical example above of talking ill about another. The person who is negatively venting  for whatever personal reasons with their own deep seated roots of frustrated experiences, will continue to keep spewing their verbiage in the  hope to gather momentum  of their stormy conversation. You can choose to be a feeder band, or choose to hold your ground in the peripheral wind, and so shed a more positive light to the conversation with a differing opinion. The moment you choose to be different, you will think differently, you will speak differently and you will change the course of the storm. You can do it with calmness in your voice and be equipoised. This will lead to the state of equanimity, which usually generates a better outcome. Sometimes silence is a good thing, but in others if you are silent you are allowing agreement to occur thereby fueling  the fire of the storm. 

The forecasting of weather is as unpredictable as human emotion. But how prepared are you for a storm is entirely up to you, and your trained mind. Being  on the edge of a storm experiencing its effects is a constant battle that we deal with, not only for ourselves but when dealing with each other. Reacting or  not reacting to the nature of the weather of the abrupt emotion is a more tedious task. If you are more alert and aware of your own emotions and how to keep them in check, you can prevent becoming a feeder band to the storm. Being in control of your emotions, you are less likely to succumb to the peripheral wind of the storm. 

Which way is the wind blowing in your neck of the woods?

Getting the bad report card

Getting the bad report card.

A,B,C,D,E,F....Pass, or Fail, grades on a report card.  We strive towards the Pass or the A grade, and when achieved we are happy. When a lower grade or Fail grade  occurs then this disrupts our demeanor and we get upset. We continue on this roller coaster of trying to fulfill others' expectations, and then we base our own happiness on these emotions. Why are we so dependent on these grades and why do we let  these expectations affect us adversely. We should always aim for the best, but as long we are doing it for ourselves. All too often we expend our energy towards pleasing others, and end up living our lives for others and not for ourselves.

When we start the process of getting successful, have you noticed that in many cases that it does not last. Same goes for resolutions that we embark on  every New Years Day. But give it a fortnight and we are back to where we started, and then the grumbling, frustration, and dissatisfaction begins all over again. It is our normal tendency to strive for a good outcome,  and then as things go our way, we end up with a concept called self sabotage. You might be thinking "that cannot be right, why would we do such a preposterous act?" The answer is simple, guilt. Since childhood, some experience or the other has taken seed that led us to feel guilty and in doing so harboring the feelings of undeserving. Such an example is when you were doing really well in school, but were compared to someone else (either a classmate or sibling) who was not, and so our subconscious out of compassion towards the person who was comparing, sets the scene for us to be less than who we are, and so backing off from our well-doing, with the feelings of guilt. This leads to self sabotage and then we falter. We are unconsciously repeating this in our daily lives. In teenage years this is called rebellion. 

" I don't deserve  this really high paying job" " I don't deserve to be happy in this relationship" " I don't deserve these new toys" These self deprecating thoughts race through us with so much force that we believe them to be truths, and then just as subconsciously as they arose, then subconsciously we prophesize our doom, and we fall from our path. This leads to our failure, subsequent anger that we then hate, and start to go down the path of negativity.  So here in a nutshell, is not only the answer to how we end up with a bad report card but also how to change it around.

Overcome the subconscious seed planted innocently, with new seeds of courage, conviction, and  consistency. Know that you were not meant to merely live, but instead to live merrily, with valor, victory, and vigor. So go laugh at your bad report card, and know that it is not YOU, and that you can do better. Know that you are not the product of this bad report card, and you are not to be defined by it. Strive for the "rebellious bad report card "with a smile, and find that just the reverse happens.

 Bad report card? Time for a time out to rethink your life and how you approach your future.

Peaceful cooperation

Peaceful cooperation

All over the world we have wars, domination, and fighting. No happiness, no peace, just misery. Everyones ego, and the almighty " I " continues to reign havoc and chaos. However,  was there a time when this was not the case? Unfortunately mankind has allowed himself to be destroyed, when fighting against your fellow man becomes the prime focus. Generating anger, frustration, hatred, inequality all lead down the path to war. Whether within a family, a tribe, a nation, between countries, it never ends in a good way.

An interesting and inspiring story was told to me by a friend. A person was escorted in to a hall where there was an abundance of food and wine, yet all the people in the room were angry and quarreling. As it happened, everyones arms were straight and everyone was upset that they could not eat the food, as they could not bend their arms. Now moving into the next room the same situation was still present, yet everyone was happy. What happened was that each person was feeding the next person, and so everyones appetite was satiated. When we work cooperatively we can accomplish wonders and feed each other. 

Working cooperatively is the answer to eradicating most of our ills that trouble us. If we are not perpetually fighting each other, then we are helping, and in doing so generating better and more positive  foundations to a better world. There are many organizations that say they help others, but seldom does the "help" reach those in need. Being more proactive in the facilitation of cooperation, goes a long way, and interestingly creates links that extend through out humanity. The next time you are out and about, just pause to look at the person to your left, and the person to your right. What can you surmise without any judgement. If you are in the mode of cooperation then choose to be open to helping, and your services will not only be sought but appreciated. Helping your fellow man is your greatest act of  service. 

Community cooperation to help to create a much needed irrigation system or coming together to help create a school for the local children. Or clearing up after a storm ravaged city, or helping watch out for one another's elderly or young in times of need. Helping during important festivities. These are but a few examples of the cooperation that we can entertain that makes a difference. When you are working together at the same task or towards the same project, we ironically forget a lot of the differences of race, creed, gender, color, social strata, and just get down to business of helping. 

The next generation needs to be able to cooperatively utilize the world's depleting resources and help continue the age of humanity. Cooperation can not be bought, it is taught, especially when you are young enough to learn it without fear. We cannot let our egos and misguided arrogance taint the next generation with fears of lack, greed, selfishness, and pride. Getting ahead in life is one thing, getting along  in life is entirely another. Cooperation breeds acceptance. Acceptance brings love. Love brings peace and happiness.

Do not break your link of cooperation, you never know, you might one day depend on it too !! 

How strong is your link ?

Course correction

Course Correction

Sailing away on the blue ocean is fun. Winds in the sails, the sun is out, the boat zig zagging away in the water, as smoothly as a knife cutting butter. The captain controlling the steering wheel and intermittently turning it a few degrees as to keep the boat on a particular zig or zag ( the nautical term is tacking). Feeling the ocean waves , the boat's sway, the tide, and the sails positioning, the Captain is in harmony with the boat as he or she is in full control of the experience. 

Being in harmony with your surroundings is not just necessary but a necessity for overall well being. Slight course corrections like the Captain manning the wheel can be made to continue to have this amazing experience of life on this blue green planet. These corrections take the forms of adjustments in attitude, perspectives, and tolerance. Just the willingness to turn the wheel a little, can make a big difference as you tack your way through life's big ocean. You still have to be mindful of the world around you, just like the sailor compensating for changes in nature's wind, the unpredictable tide and other nautical vehicles.  The Captain of the boat is in awe for the greatness of the ocean. You too have to respect your surroundings with awe and peace. 

The journey is diverse  with infinite possibilities of directional travel. The boat can take on any vector, at the discretion of the Captain. So too at the discretion of the Self, you direct your consciousness ( the boat) across life's ocean. Your crew has to be capable to handle the boat. This includes your faculties of mind, your ego, and your will. The more efficient your crew, and in control of their abilities, the less the Captain has to navigate to compensate for course correction. The more disorganized and chaotic your crew, the harder the Captain ,i.e  the Self has to work to get the boat back on track. A well trained and disciplined crew is as important to the well being of the boat as  the Self's awareness of the surrounding nature. Working together, crew and captain, mind and spirit, allow the cruise on the high seas can be an enjoyable one. 

The amount of course correction is different for everyone, and different depending on the circumstances. High seas and storms are all part of life's nature force. It is how we choose to sail through these storms with the least amount of course correction required, that dictates how steady our journey ends up. Practicing in calmer waters is always helpful and the more we practice the better our nautical skill, so that even in the toughest of sailing conditions we are able to navigate with ease. So in this regard the more meditation and practicing of good, ethical behaviors of gentleness, kindness, gratitude and mercy results in fruitful passage.

May the sun be behind you to guide you, May the winds be in your sails, May your heart, mind, spirit be one, Bon voyage !!

Counting down

Counting down

How long before lunch time? How much longer till the end of the day? when can I get back to my bed again? So often we spend our days consciously or subconsciously counting down. I hear this many a day from office staff, even if it is an hour into the work day" How many more hours before I punch out?" Everything we do is counting down. We are taught todo this as we plan our routines, essentially helping us get from task to task. At a traffic light in some countries the moment the red signal starts for 60-90 seconds and a little counter display starts counting down and literally 15 seconds away from the green light the car honking begins from the back to the front. We are programmed to count down.

This counting down extends the length  throughout our lives. We are counting down the years till we die. We count down till the next vacation. We count down till the next meal. We count down till the next chance we can curl up into bed and sleep. Even my toothbrush has a counting down timer for two minutes to make sure that I brush for the minimum recommendation of 2 minutes. In my opinion counting down leads to more stress. We are pressured to complete tasks in a time sensitive environment without appreciating what we are actually doing, as there is probably another long list of directives waiting for us, and we have to get through it all, and so counting down till all tasks are done and then and only then can we rest.  We even count down days till christmas as we wait for Santa to come and visit. Counting down is ever more obvious on New Years Eve when we count down till the very end of the old year and celebrate the beginning of the next. 

But what if you decide to put this paradigm on its head and count upwards? You may be surprised how much more productive, and happier you are. There is so much more freedom knowing that there is time to spend to do something, as opposed to knowing you only have a limited time after which you are on borrowed time, or have failed in your attempts at completing the task. Imagine the feeling of joy that you have so many more years of a healthy life. More years to be creative, more time to learn, more time to explore and visit places. Counting up actually releases more endorphins with more happiness and more peace. I believe that we were not meant to live a stress-full life but instead a stress-less or stress-free life. Counting up makes you look forward towards your next task versus dreading it. Counting up the years of your life as you go, piles on wisdom instead of hating getting old and counting down till the end. If we were meant to only count down we should have been born old and work backwards, yet we are born young to be able count upwards. Even when we are taught our numerics  we count up. Now do not jump into the negative sense and count up the national expenditure and debt, but instead count up with amount of good that can be done with that money spend in the appropriate sectors of public expenditure. 

I have found counting up the number of stars in the night sky very fun, as I am relieved that the universe is that big to hold so many constellations, and so in comparison my problems are that small and insignificant. Counting down is finite, counting up is infinite. Which side of infinity do you wish to be? So start counting up your blessings each day, along with the number of things to be grateful for in your life. You can start simple, go big. Count up all the good things you have done and build on it. You  can count up  all the bad things that have happened to you or said to you in the day, but  at the end let that list go. You may just end up living a more fuller life, a more wholesome fresher existence. Counting down the negatives, and counting up the positives may lead to a better balance sheet as you find you are in the black more often than not.  

If you are having a hard time counting, ask your nearest child to help you. They will gladly assist with a smile get you back in the mode of appropriate directional counting. Luckily my toothbrush has the program setting that counts upwards to 2 minutes as well! 

How high can you count today?

Ramping up and ramping down

Ramping up and Ramping down.

We live our lives with a certain rhythm. Running from time interval to time interval. Following the beats of our hearts and minds surrounded by the burdens of the day and night we journey through with a certain passion for the tune. We appear at times to follow the score sheet of instrumental music, but in fact the music of life  flows within us, around us, and through us with great orchestral patterns. Bursts of uncertainty in life are the striking chords that keeps the music piece fresh and vibrant.  

Sometimes we have too many things to do and are caught up with the hubbub of our egos and minds clashing like cymbals in a band. Too loud that our-Self cannot be heard above the din. We ramp up the music and then ramp it down as the tempo of our lives change with events. If you imagine that our-Self is the musician, the instrument we play the medium through which we express ourselves, then we can either choose to follow the music score sheet, or let the music flow. Listen to the sound of the musical notes as they emanate, and letting them just settle where  they will, without judgement. Let the music of life flow and see how it makes you feel.

 Instead of the highs and lows of the song, the ramping up and down of the notes in life, allow a more even measurement of the tune in your life to take over. Letting go of the control of your emotions is the first idea. Acceptance of the music of your heart in whatever shape or form is the second. Thirdly,  observation of the serenade of the echo of your life music. Fourthly, the awareness of the flow of the music as it varies from pulse to pulse. All these together can harness the power of the moment. In the end that is all we have. The musician knows how the whole music piece should go, but just being in the moment of the piece, drives the passion to make it either a brilliant well performed song or a disjointed cacophony of notes.  Similarly we can be in the moment and live it to the fullest and so enjoy the flow that will bring great joy. 

Clothed in kindness, happiness, joy, gentleness, patience and humbleness we can strive to make this piece of music of our lives the best piece ever written. You never know when a stranger is sitting in the hotel lobby listening to a brilliant yet humble pianist playing his heart and soul out with great gusto and vigor. Who is listening to him as he plays? Maybe no one, yet he plays as he is the only one who is really the most important as he is playing his song. Maybe everyone is listening and his music touches everyone in the lobby as they go by, taking a fragment of joy that he plays into their soul. His music reaches everywhere, as his passion and energy reshape the vibrations in  the air to a positive ambience. He offers his love of his music freely, as he is in rhythm with his life and purpose. And sometimes surprisingly the playing of his music will draw an appreciative audience. Be not afraid of the chords, but be afraid of not playing the music of your soul. 

Your silence, your loss. So lets throw away the sheet music and have a musical party!!

just another 15 minutes please

Just another 15 minutes please...

"Time is an illusion, lunch time doubly so" is a quote from one of my all time favorite books, Hitch hikers guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. However this seems to be a very true statement. I hear this phrase " just another 15 minutes  please"  with different permutations such as in the context " I need just another 15 minutes" or " I wish I had just another 15 minutes to myself  in my day" or " See you in just another 15 minutes." Basically, implying that we are constantly running behind time. Do we have so many chores and things to do that there is just not enough time in the day to do them or do we crave that extra breathing  time from moment to moment ? Why not another hour in our day for ourselves? What is most valuable these days is not gold, or silver, but time management seems to have become the new hot commodity. We all desire and need more time. We are always running out of it and soon enough our allotted stay on this planet abruptly ends like a parking meter, and out pops the sign EXPIRED. Even if you were immortal you would still run out of time. 

So how do we get back just another 15 minutes or more. Sure,the more we try to  manage the time, the more we fail. Such is the nature of another important commodity, money. If we do not plan our finances properly, they run out, so too is the issue with time. Planning your day is important, but be a spendthrift and spend some time for yourself. I find that  10 minutes every day saved up for myself to be alone with my thoughts, and in silent meditation significantly recharges  me that I find myself "earning time" later in the day.I try to reuse this earned time ( or mileage points ) to spend more quiet time with myself and before I know it I have recuperated an hour of "my time." 

Quantum physics will explain that time is finite. Some religions will preach time is infinite or others will explain it in either linear or circular dimensions. Whatever your idea of time, the mind can play tricks leading you to either not enough or an abundance of time left. It is your mind's perspective. Perhaps cutting back on unnecessary chores, or not being in so much control of everything around you, will enable you to collect a few seconds, gather up then a few minutes, then who knows maybe store up even an hour or two !! 

Another trick I utilize is that I wear no watch. I have discovered that I have developed an innate sense of time, that was lost to me  for so many years while wearing a watch. I am freer, I get more accomplished and invariably ahead of schedule. When you are bound to a device such as your phone, your wrist watch or a clock, you are always pressured and so may lose the ability to feel the moment and experience it as it passes. This was quite disorienting for me without a doubt for the first few days, but then my natural sense ( that we are all born with) took over and guided me better throughout my busy day. We work harder and harder to get more and more and then have to work harder still to maintain that new lifestyle or balance. We work more, spend more "time", and end up just being miserable. Hence we need vacations. To get away from it all we goto better vacation resorts, and then run around exhausted and then need  "time"when we return to get our breath back. Then work more to pay for the vacation and so the false illusion of time manifests itself. If all we need is time to connect to our-Self, then geography is not going to make that happen, since you can connect with your-Self and the universe and all around you at any moment at ANY time. 

Being in the moment, being still, being timeless, recharges you more than you can ever expect. Listen to everything and react to nothing. See everything around you, and react to nothing.  Smell everything around you and react to nothing. Take a lesson from nature. It is the same energy that you were born with, reconnect to it and you will find that you do not need just another 15 minutes. Moreover you will have more than enough time to enjoy your life. 

Time is an illusion, but you are not. What are you going to do in the next  15 minutes that you have earned today?