Certifications and Credentials

The world holds us to a higher standard in every aspect and walk of life. Whether you are in the health care field, the auto industry, the legal profession, work in a supermarket, or even a landscaper or work in the swimming pool business, you are required to have a certification, which usually requires an examination, then a fee is paid for a framed plaque. Whatever service you wish to purchase, for example you want to go to a mechanic and get your car fixed. You pretty much always check out the numerous credentials on the walls informing you that the service manager or the service technician got an award for either knowing what they were doing or for just being a customer satisfying person ( someone who listens to you vent !) The same holds true if you go into the offices of professionals such as dentists, doctors, lawyers or CPAs. The certifications on the wall from variety of money making organizations verifying that an expensive examination was passed and the person is credentialed to provide their service. 

Now most will say, well of course we want someone to be certified ! I agree too, for is that not  the reason why one goes to the school for that occupation or profession? However, just because an examination is performed, does not mean anything to verify that someone can really do their job or provide excellent quality of service. It is the false sense  of security we get from seeing a calligraphed signed paper in a nice frame hanging on the wall  that lures us in. Perhaps there are more important qualities that need certification and credentialing and then celebrated for all to see and appreciate.

Such qualities to name but a few,  are kindness, compassion , love, gratitude, patience, thoughtfulness or peacefulness. Where are these certifications or plaques that we as a society have chosen to ignore to celebrate and honor or even appreciate that speaks volumes about the individual in comparison to what we have now. I can easily point out individuals with these big titles and glorious fancy reports in several professions who do not  even have one of the qualities described above. But I wont. Our focus is so much on pleasing others that enriching ourselves is forgotten. 

I believe we have to have a larger view of our humanity and not be short sighted into what self appointed bonafide organizations with short and long mnemonics that test our patience and resolve with unnecessary testing and threats, tell us to think. These establishments hold these pieces of paper over the individual's heads like dangling carrots and make them beholden to them for allegiance, else the consumer (us) will look away from them.  We have to believe in ourselves and our fellow man alike, and only once trust  is forged, can we move forward in self advancement and evolution. We need to hold the world to a higher standard by holding ourselves to that same standard.

So go for the credential examination of endurance, strength, love, compassion, listening, understanding, politeness, decency, tolerance and respect and pass it with flying colors. Unfortunately you will not get a framed paper of certification for your sincere efforts, but you just may get a grateful smile or a warm hug. 

Honey where is the list?

Things to do, things to do, there are always more things to do.

 

 I have always been a list person. I make my daily, weekly, monthly lists of things to do, things to get, things to read, things to get or buy, list of people to call. Things to be done by certain time points, goals, targets, chores inside the house, chores outside the house, they all get put onto these lists. I have back ups of the back up lists ( including the copy of the list  I give to my wife to help me with the things to do). It is endless and more over relentess.  To boot I then even can highlight them in multiple colors.  These days lists can be in paper form, or digital ( on the computer, or on your mobile device). I recently found Apps for the smartphone that will remind you of items on the list that are overdue or need to get done. Voice command lists, and commanding voice reminder lists are all available with the new devices. A "post-it note" for the computer screen or for your smart phone  is a frequently used application. All of these reminders, notes, to do lists, can all be color coded, alphabetized, categorized and filed !! The insanity of list making is an obsession that goes on till we decide to stop it. WE drive ourselves to our early graves with many such an obsession, but why do we do it? 

 

Is it our need for control of our environments, our lives and the lives of friends and family or is it the  perceived sense of control that we crave. Until we give up that control, we cannot move on with our lives, and open up the wondrous possibilities that are waiting for us at every turn. Imagine if the focus was not on the lists, but more on the spontaneous moment to moment activities. There is a lot to be said about "living in the moment." We make lists of our New Years resolutions, then when they are not fulfilled we are so distraught that we have not lived up to our expectations, or resolutions but moreover that we  did not live up to our lists !! 

 

The lists eventually drive us in all directions. Endless activities for the kids to do ( dance, gym, swimming, karate, music etc. ), infinite chores at home, horizonless  places to go, and then we are swamped in a sea of "must haves and must dos" that we drown in them, since there is never any time for us to complete all these tasks and just breathe. Fatigued, fed up, frustrated we give up. The lists can be long or they can be filled with arduous tasks which we postpone to other lists. An example is I recently hurt my shoulder and in physical therapy a list of exercises were given to me. Yet I only tackled for the most part the easier of the therapies. For proper healing and stretching I was correctly advised that it was the tougher exercises that had to be attempted, and so I went on my way to do exactly that, the harder items on the list.  Taking care of the important items on the list and letting go of the rest may help declutter mind body and spirit from all the unnecessary that plagues our lives. We eventually are beholden to the list! A life of lists of accomplishments, successes or failures, are how we define ourselves. Jumping from list to list, day to day, year to year, lifetime to lifetime without realizing the beauty of the in-between. 

I sometimes wonder what if I were to replace these lists with more important items and tasks how would I feel. What would my perspective be? Lets try a little exercise if you are in the mood of making lists ! You might as well make it fun. Here goes. 

 

Make a top five item list in each of the following categories:

 

1) Advices you want to teach your child to aide them in their future 

2) Places you must see 

3) Friends you must meet 

4) Good qualities to comment on to your nearest loved one.

5) If the world was ending in a week what do you absolutely want to do before you die?

6) Good qualities about yourself

7) Ways you have changed yourself

8) Ways you would like to change yourself

9) Your definition of peace

10) Your impression of happiness

 

( feel free to expand the list to your discretion !!) 

 

Perhaps lists of kindness, good deeds, ways to help someone, ways to change the world are more important than the mundane paper or digital lists that we make that clutter our desks, phones, computers and clog up our minds. 

 

I often wonder how people without lists function?  Probably just fine. I am going to try that this year. Let go, slow down and enjoy the moment and be list free. Cast your lists and cares to a strong east wind, and explore the unimaginable. Put being list free on your list of things to do, put it at the top of the list !!

 

The concept of Moine

The Concept of "Moine"

I hear this all this time. The little finger points at some random item usually my phone, or some other electronic device and then it comes, the emphatic " moine !" Followed by a cute smile. This is what my little son says to me all the time when I am at home. I know he is saying "mine" with an innocent sense of belonging, but phonetically it sounds like " moi-ne." He says it with conviction and such sweetness, dare I reveal to him the truth that what is his is his, and what is mine will also be his? !!

Where do we get this concept of mine and yours? Is it at school while playing with other children and some other child takes some thing from our hand and says " mine!!" and runs away with it and then we have a sense of loss? Is that when we identify separation of inanimate object with ourselves? Or is it that it is learned  earlier than that when we are still infants? Perhaps as we are learning about our own identity we learn how we relate to all other objects and people around us and in an effort of self preservation we start making connections for the rest of our lives at the deepest levels that remain with us.  This concept of mine and yours, and the separation of the two, holds true at many distinct hierarchies of emotional and  intellectual  development. Right from simple and  complex inanimate household items to emotional attachments in relationships, idealogical fundamentals, religious beliefs, to finances, material wealth and land ownership. 

Unfortunately lawsuits, divorces, fights, murders, and even wars have taken place of many a dispute, and yet continue daily in all walks of life and parts of the world from back alleys to corporations and governments. How do we prevent the devastation that is a bi-product of a concept so simple that if rationalized simpler solutions can be sought. The Ego rears its ugly head all the time in these cases and invariably provides the wrong answer. We come into this world with nothing, we leave with nothing, and all that we choose to keep eventually we give away before we die. It is  interesting that what we choose to hold on to, or give away or even share tells a lot about who we are as an individual and the life that we choose to live. 

Granted my little fledgling is too young to fully grasp these concepts, but one day he will, and I think if I keep making a conscious effort in not taking things away from him like the phone, but instead explain to him that the phone is not a toy and let him explore the device safely  with me next to him, then his insatiable childish desire can be allowed to be ignited and directed. I try this with him frequently and he then happily redirects his interest onto something else ( usually now my wife's phone ) having had his "thrill" with my phone. He will learn and he will explore. We all do it, have done it, and continue to do it, but if we are constantly  being told "NO" or let each others' egos get in the way, we can not allow the concepts of sharing to coexist. Once this flame of sharing is lit, all peaceful possibilities can be entertained. 

Imagine a world if ideals, ideas, beliefs, possessions, food, good health and technology are shared and the concept of "moine" is replaced what a world that would be. I believe it is the world right here, right now, and it is not all "moine !!"