Down into the rabbit hole we go

Down in to the rabbit hole we go.

Do you remember the famous tale of Alice in Wonderland? She chased a rabbit into a hole and landed into a bizarre world. She was chasing the curiosity, which led her into trouble. A most interesting lesson if you can follow through the storyline, especially when you realize that you are in fact Alice and you go down a hole every day of your life. The question really then becomes have you come out of the hole or are you still burrowing and have lost sight of the entrance hole. What world are we living in, if not a fragmented psychedelic version of Wonderland  that we like to call reality ?

Whether it is in the jobs that we drudge through or the drama of family reenactments, or simply the mountains of stimuli that encase us, we are overcome and overwhelmed. The pressures and stresses of our lives leads us further down the hole that we have chosen to go through. The key words here are that "we have chosen." No one puts a gun to our head or makes us do anything that we choose not to do. Our lives are our own, till we choose that it is  not, and in the process lose ourselves. We have no one to blame but ourselves for allowing that loss of identity and the loss of control of our lives. One day we turn around and cannot see the hole entrance and then the subsequent feelings of being overpowered by this tunnel of misery come flooding in. The tunnel appears to close in on itself and on top of us. Getting buried alive is not to be taken lightly. It not only makes it harder to find a way out, but chokes the spirit till we finally die a silent meaningless death inside without the chance to cry out, "save me, I want out..."

All is not as grim and all is not as lost. You have the chance to build strong scaffolding that will ensure the tunnel of life stressors does not collapse upon you. Being aware of your surroundings is your tool, your spade to dig you out of the mess. "Letting go" and not constantly being in a state of  reacting, allows you to dig a wider tunnel with adequate space. Your strength of resolve ensures that you have a second shaft for air, a necessity  that all expert tunnel  builders will tell you. However in the end, your ability of free will, is what helps you to choose to go or not to go down the rabbit hole. Many will say that they live for others and have given themselves to others so completely that they have lost their identity unto others. You can easily make excuses and blame someone, something or a particular  circumstance but again that too is a choice of your life. Live a life of excuses or live free of excuses. There are plenty of people in the world who live free and simpler and perhaps more peaceful lives. Avoiding the rabbit hole does not translate into avoiding to live. It means you either are better prepared to go down the hole or find a better hole to go down to explore. 

If you do go down the hole, I would strongly suggest taking a flashlight. The more in tune you are with ourself, the brighter your inner flashlight to help you illuminate your path. Listen to your heart and brave the journey into the hole and out the other side. Most things through the hole and in your tunnel of your life are in fact beautiful but cannot be touched with anything except your heart.  Your pride will tell you that this is impossible. Your sense of experience will alert you that it is too risky. Your rationale will inform you  that it is pointless. Your heart and your soul will whisper "give it a try". 

Enjoy your personal Wonderland, just do not  be led by a strange rabbit, even if he had a cool hat.

Mirror mirror on the wall...

Mirror Mirror on the wall.....

It is very interesting that we look at ourselves in the mirror and we only see what we choose to see. We actually do not see who we really are, physically, mentally or spiritually. This is very much akin to visiting the circus  and going into the hall of mirrors. Each mirror depending on its concavity or convexity can portray distorted images of ourselves. These reflections vary according to our own opinion even if the mirror is appropriately and correctly made. 

We see ourselves through myopic vision and through a muddy filter of self criticism. Our ego sees us as grandiose and larger than life. Our mind sees us as inferior and ugly. Our experiences may see us through shame and inadequacy. Our pride may see us as self loathing. Our heart may see us as wounded and vulnerable. Our soul sees us as pure, bright and whole. It is not the mirror that needs to change but which part of ourself sees us. Moreover once this slight fine tuning of attitude occurs, we then reflect that image of the truer self in other words,  the image we wish to portray. 

Try a little exercise. Look at yourself in the mirror in the morning after getting up. Do not hurry to put on your Egyptian sarcophagus mask of make up, and simply look at yourself. Then see yourself. There is a subtle difference in words but an enormous  difference in reality. Write down what you look in one column and what you see in another. You will be surprised that the list is exactly opposite. When you "look" you are observing the superficial you. When you "see" you are observing the deeper true You. Try this exercise with a few trusted friends, but instead of the 2 columns just ask them to make a list of what they see. Instinctively your trusted friend will observe a very different persona and list of attributes that you may or may not have come up with. However this clearly demonstrates that observation is in the eye of the beholder, and moreover self criticism can be dangerous in that the true you may never come out if all you do is listen to this albeit false "version" of yourself. I have spoken to friends and asked them what they thought about themselves and found they may have a very self defeating portrayal of their identities. In fact most of the times I pointed out my observations about them, that were not only the opposite, but more positive. Was I wearing my myopic positive corrected   prescription glasses or was I simply seeing their truer natures?

Indeed self criticism  is important to help you  improve your personality, your goals and sharpen your skills. However this can lead to a darker path of self deprecation that ends up locking you in your cupboard and afraid of the world. Both extremes are possible without the leading rope of our spirit to guide us to a better and genuine self image and reflection. If unchecked a mirror of vanity can unleash an ego on the path of fabled destruction as seen in Snow White and the Seven dwarfs !  A cracked mirror is a sign of a fragmented mind. A shattered mirror is a sign of a broken heart.  Fears, doubts, anxieties and over self criticisms are usually the forces that initiate the damage to the mirror. An inability to see clearly through the broken pieces of mirror or see the forces that cause the fracture in the first place, is what leads to our eventual collapse. This inability to envision your Self is clouded by the ego. But how do you start seeing yourSelf?  Start by using different senses to see.

Courage to even look beyond your bad experiences is the first step. Then comes the acceptance to see through your wounded ego. This is hard as your ego will put up a terrific fight. Forgiveness to your aching heart comes only after you have tamed your windy mind with patience. Penultimately faith in yourSelf cuts through the negativity and reveals your awaiting  spirit. Gratitude at everything past and present that has happened or is happening to you, releases you to launch into a future with a clearer and truly representative reflection. 

"Mirror, mirror on the wall who is the fairest of them all?"

The mirror replies: "You tell me...."

My my what a big stick you have

My My What a big stick you have?

 Have you ever noticed a person walking with a cane or a stick? They come in all shapes, sizes, colors and materials. The mechanics are most interesting. They are designed and fashioned to act almost like a tripod or in most instances as a crutch or to be an assistance in ambulation. They take the stress off most of the weight or full weight while either sitting down or standing up or in between the ambulation steps. The purpose is to provide support for the injured  party during a period of weakness. So too is the nature of a helpful friend, a supportive spouse, a nurturing parent or caregiver. One must never forget the individual who has to put up with the stress. In many cases it can be you as the injured party needing support, or you can be the kind stick providing the stressful support. 

With each step a lot of force and pressure is wielded into the stick or cane. Overtime if appropriate care towards the stick is not given it may crack or break under the exorbitant pressures. Even these supportive devices need a break from time to time. Have you ever talked to your cane, or crutch and asked this helpful individual as to how they are doing. Perhaps they need to relieve some pressure and tell their side of the story. This aide has been with you at a significant period in your life when  you most needed them. Perhaps reuniting with them before the stress fracture occurs is just as important as connecting with them at the beginning of the journey. According to Newtonian physics and third law,  there is an equal force placed on the stick as is placed on the individual, namely the law of action and reaction. So if you understand this principle you realize that this happy coexistence, this equal measure of force,  will not hold up unless both sides are equally strong. 

Your supporting person is only as strong as they are allowed to become. Through caring that they show you, you get stronger. So too this can be reciprocated. Be it a friend, a spouse, a parent or a primary care provider, the relationship is that of a much needed supportive cane. Treating him or her with respect, attention  and love,  is as valuable as you treating yourself in the same manner. Hence this develops the much needed strength to fulfill Newton's third law, ensuring many more years of steadfastness of your supportive device.

How strong is your stick or cane on any given day?

Looking up at the stars

Looking up at the stars

The loud  noises of the car horns, the brightness from the city street lights,  the luminescent buildings and electric commercial  signs, combined with the fast pace of our lives leave much to be desired as  we keep our heads down towards the ground and get to our preconceived destinations. We sometimes even miss our fellow walkers as we bustle through our day neither  making connections nor connecting to our surroundings. Yet we are always looking up at the stars for guidance to our personal chaos. When we get the rare chance to be outside at night, and the light of man made origin turns off, we see a new sort of radiance of light emerge as we readjust our eyes to the night time. 

The stillness is deafening. The serenity can be disconcerting to an agitated and distracted mind. The radiance is that of the star light. Like pin holes in the heavens, the night sky shines brightly down with effulgence. It is unfortunate that we either miss this amazing sight due to the artificial light pollution or our eternal material distractions in life. So too is true when we turn off the outside light and look inward at the beauty of the light of our souls. We look to the heavens above for guidance, yet it is the soul within that is always in connection with this heavenly pathfinder. The infinite stars not only represent the light to guide our nights, but also the infinite possible directions that we can take with our lives. Shining bright through our creativity, our Self expression, our inner radiance guides our day and night lives. 

How do we tap into this light? In my opinion, first acknowledge that you are You, and accept yourself for who you are. Perfections and flaws alike, simply accept that who you were, who you are today and who you will become in the future. Once you do this, you are giving the true You a chance at recognition by allowing your ever ominous, looming and overbearing mind to bow gracefully in acknowledgment at something other than itself. This chance gives way to the spirit, your true nature to start voicing its opinion.  

Next comes facing the next hurdle which is your fears and doubts. By confronting them all head on with a warm embrace. Feel the light from the candle of your soul start to burn brighter, and brighter till it has engulfed your fears and shone the light to disperse all the darkness. No corner of the room of your mind's eye should be left without being illuminated. This almost is like a mind cleansing of your old thoughts, doubts, anxieties, worries and more over your own self critisizm. Once you have dealt with these "demons"you become lighter to float and be as airy as the luminesence that you are trying to reveal. 

Being free to touch the stars with the belief that anything is possible is the next stage of evolutionary mindfulness. Dispensing the notion of disbelief is accomplishable if you try in the physical to be present at night time outside and feel yourelf as part of the stars above. Why do we look to the stars for guidance when we know that our souls if unburdened by the chains of the mind, have the  power to connect to the creator and the universe in an instant. The infinite stars are like infinite destinations waiting to be explored. To borrow and paraphrase a quote that " as it is on earth, so it is in heaven" I would add that as the inner light shines within, so does it shine from above, as seen in the twinkling of the luminescent night sky.  

Standing outside, the more our eyes dilate in the night and we get accustomed to the darkness, the clearer we see the stars, and if you have ever focussed on these stars you see more of them and with progressive brightness. The "twinkle" is like the stars looking back at you and winking as if to say we see you, we  hear you and we are here to help. Similarly the more you clean up your mind to start experiencing the stillness, the clearer the mind's eye vision gets to start seeing the bright star of your shining true Self glow and take over your sky, your life, and your experiences. The clearer your mind, the clearer it can see your spirit and its  ever present and progressive radiance. A fun exercise that usually only children do and easily dismissed by the intelligent and more evolved adult is counting the stars as they come out every hour. It is interesting how many more stars a child can count than the adult, since not only is their mind more free of clutter but also free and innocent enough to enjoy the experience of the moment. How many stars can you count?

Look at all the stars out tonight, which one do you want to touch? The night is yours and so is the destination.

"I am"prejudice

" I am " prejudice

We are constantly bombarded by the media with the news reports of hate crimes. Bigotry, infidelity, nepotism and crimes against cultural, religious,gender or societal groups are so common these days that it does not even phase us for the most part. We see these reports, it may make us feel sick and angry briefly but then we quietly continue our daily mundane lives as if all these things do not effect us. We act as if this is all just happening on television and not really to any one  individual or group somewhere else in the world and sometimes even in the next street or town over. The world has become a much smaller place to live in, and with continued depletion of earth's resources, we really cannot afford prejudice against anyone or any group lest it continue to plague us with violence, war, hate, death and destruction. 

Where does this prejudice come from? Clearly we know that little children do not have such attributes when they are born and while their innocence lasts, peace reigns. So taking a page out of their book several questions arise. At what point does this change for them? Is it when they enter preschool, kindergarden, or further on  in their educational and life experiences? How can we extend out this range of peaceful coexistence that they have revealed to us for the entire length of their lives?

Some answers may stem from the all mighty " I am " that develops very early on in our lifetimes. We have to create this "I am" in order to form this sense of self and belonging. We try to do this so that we understand our place in the universe, our place on the earth as we then try to broaden our sense of purpose. We embed ourselves into this identity that the ego formulates and so cannot change, or can we? We will join into packs and groups and work cooperatively as little children in school but any threat to that fragile ego or the self, results us in shutting down and protecting the " I am"  at whatever the cost. We form groups with other like minded individuals who are unknowingly also fearful. Then to preserve the " I am " or the newly formed "we are", we systematically gravitate to a single ideal not based in fact but more in fiction led by an individual ( arguably the most frightened with the most to lose), and rally behind them. The only way to preserve an ego is to stomp out all other egos with the declaration of not just " I am or we are" but " I am right and you are wrong". Armed with this mantra we proceed to dismantle the existent religious, societal, or  cultural structure of  others in a desperate effort of self preservation. It is truly a desperate effort as it is really just an expression  of the self, but since no one is listening to each other, the shouting to be heard becomes the typical mob mentality that we are accustomed to seeing. 

We are hardened by these reports and choose not to accept them as reality, as in doing so, it may just hone in on the fact that such things do happen and that any one of us could be victims of the same prejudice. So we choose to ignore instead of inspire change. We choose to hide instead of hinder the progress of prejudice. The next generation and the subsequent ones are inheriting a world of hate. An earth with scarce resources is what is being left for their future. You can try to change peoples minds with ideals, but you cannot change their prejudices with out changing their hearts. You change the hearts by making people want to change their Selves. If something is important to you or you know it will affect you adversely, you are conditioned and genetically programmed to evolve and adapt. If you realize that there is no threat, there is no fear. If no fear, then you give love a chance to grow within your heart, guided by the aware Self, you then change your mind. Perhaps finding differences in gender, race, religion, creed, societal and cultural values then does not become priority, and the shift to more pressing needs like reducing the burden of negativity in the world, developing peaceful cooperation and re-nurturing dwindling resources takes precedent. 

The " I am" should not to be quenched as one might think, but more  allowed to bloom with out the menacing fear of self annihilation. Children are amazingly adaptable and malleable. The role models of their parents,friends and teachers that they follow must be of sound mind, spirit and consciousness if we have any hope to survive as a species. When you find only one type of flower in an otherwise diverse garden, you do not just pluck out the flower but instead you try to grow that species of flower and broaden its survival chances in numbers. You give it the nurturing love that all life needs to succeed and thrive. If we see ourselves only as " I am" the unfortunately "We" will despair. Almost a self defeating prophecy occurs while trying to preserve the Self, we destroy the self and others in the process. When we harm another in thought, word or act, we have already harmed our Selves. 

When you see prejudice, do not turn a blind eye or turn the other cheek. Fighting prejudice is everyones problem not someone else's problem somewhere else. The " I am " concept in my opinion should be expanded to further words such as 

" I am more.." 

" I am love"

 " I am help"

 " I am joy" 

" I am kind"

"I am goodness"

"I am not prejudicial'

What extension to your " I am......" will you add on today?